I want to be an airline pilot

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In this first edition of my newsletter, I share some key learnings about how one of my clients overcame his own resistance to meet a leadership challenge.

Here is what happened at our recent coaching session…..

“Either I am out on a limb or I’m playing safe.”

This is how my coaching client described his biggest challenge.

Reporting to the CEO, he is seen as a potential successor.

His company faces tough challenges and must make some difficult decisions.

Opinion is split amongst his boss and peers on the executive team.

Colleagues’ ideas are getting more airtime. He fears that if his voice is not heard, opportunities could be lost and business prospects damaged.

He hasn’t stepped up yet.

Why not?

Rather than drag him down into a deep diagnosis of his problem, I encouraged him to be curious about how he was describing it.

Noticing the language leaders use to describe their problems can help cut straight through to solutions.

I always pay close attention to the metaphors my coaching clients use.

Describing himself  “Being out on a limb”  paints a vivid picture about fears of:

  • Isolation

  • Vulnerability

  • Risk

Having envisioned failure, I invited my client to now create a picture of success.

“What metaphor describes you, at your best “influencing the business ” ?

He instantly responded:

Up on the flight deck, piloting an aircraft…

With a clear destination, planned route and able to change course…

Leading a team, drawing on their expertise.

A month later when we next meet, I ask him

“Did you fly?”

He then told me that, since our last coaching session:

  • He had secured the agreement of the CEO and executive committee for him to lead an initiative introducing a new business operating model.

  • He talked me through his plans to work closely with his peers to deliver change that will deliver tangible benefits within three to six months. 

What can we learn from this?

The metaphors we use to describe our challenges are like windows into our minds.

They are clues about what is really blocking us, including concerns about lack of support, doubts about how much agency we can have or fears of failure. 

Three key learnings: 

  1. As we use metaphors to describe our experience, they can get embedded so that our fears become our lived experience, our reality.

  1. In highlighting the beliefs and attitudes holding us back, metaphors also point to what we need to change to increase our chances of success.

  1. Changing the metaphor to describe our challenges, focuses us on what we need to do to overcome them. The more we use that language, the more embedded it becomes, shaping how we behave. 

What do you think?

Can it be as easy as that?

Try it for yourself.

  • Think of a leadership challenge you are currently facing. Ideally a recurring issue or one that is causing you major concerns.

    • What metaphor would you use to describe it?

  • Then imagine yourself, at your best, solving this problem.

    • What’s the metaphor you would use?

  • Notice how that changes your feelings and beliefs about it and what action you can take.

I’d love to hear how you get on with it

I hope you enjoyed this first edition of my newsletter.

Please forward to colleagues or associates who you think would also find it useful.

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‘Til next time.

John